1. You have to publish a menu there as explained here
http://shape5.com/demo/city_portal/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=36&Itemid=802. You have to pick the menu style in your template configuration area of Joomla
3. Yes this is because you need to publish a login module or anything to the cpanel position in order for that tab to show:
http://shape5.com/demo/city_portal/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=14&Itemid=494. The backgrounds are available for download under the city portal downloads category. These also can be set via the template parameters are in the admin of your Joomla site. You have to upload them to your server somewhere and then you just link to them via a URL which is entered in the template parameters area.